The Ancient Order of Neurothena – Founding Membership
The Ancient Order of Neurothena – Founding Membership
Few are chosen. Fewer remain.
To enter the Ancient Order of Neurothena is to renounce chaos and embrace clarity. For centuries, seekers of knowledge have walked a lonely path. Now, the Order calls for 100 initiates to step forward.
Each will be marked, robed, and summoned when the time comes.
What awaits cannot be spoken. It can only be lived.
Will you awaken?
What You Receive as an Initiate:
The Convergence: invitation to all future gatherings of the Order. These may manifest as secret medieval-themed masquerade balls, ancient rites of knowledge, or brainpower rituals held in hidden halls. What awaits cannot be described. The Convergence will begin only when the Circle of 100 is complete.
The Initiation Relic: a hand-sealed decree marking your passage into the Order.
The Ritual Tool: a feather quill, forged for seekers of knowledge.
The Mark of the Order: your personal wax seal and navy wax.
The Robe of Midnight: to be worn at gatherings of the Order.
The Eternal Right: lifetime 25% discount on all Neurothena Brain Fuel.
Membership Details:
Only 100 memberships will ever be created. Once filled, no others will be admitted.
Physical Initiation Packs will be dispatched in October 2025. Until then, silence will be your companion.
Each Initiate will be contacted in secrecy and sent their Relics in due time.
The Order will summon members with encrypted messages and invitations.
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Neurothena
The clean, fast-acting alternative to caffeine. Built to fuel your productivity without the side effects.
Tired of the jitters, crashes, heartburn, racing heart, gut issues, and anxious buzz of caffeine?
You might not realise it, but caffeine from coffee, matcha, and energy drinks is often the culprit.
Neurothena is the alternative.
Formulated by a molecular biologist after watching his wife struggle with the side effects of caffeine, Neurothena was created to fuel the mind, without compromising the body.
It’s the clean, fast-acting productivity drink that actually works.
"As someone with caffeine sensitivity, Neurothena gives me energy, sharpens my focus, clears and calms my mind for deep work. All without the crashes, anxiety, increased heart rate, or stomach issues caused my coffee, matcha and energy drinks... And it's delicious!"
- Dr. Sam Malafeh, early tester of Neurothena
What It Has & Does:
- 💥 Mango Leaf Extract (Zynamite®) – a clinically studied, fast-acting brain & body energizer
- 🍄 Lion’s Mane Mushroom – supports memory + brain health
- 🧠 Ginseng + Magnesium + zinc – focus + calm, stress resilience
- 🧃 Blackcurrant Extract – boosts brain blood flow and stamina
- 🔬 100% caffeine-free. No jitters. No withdrawal. No drama.
- No added sugars. Nothing Artificial.
Created For:
Doers. Creators. Founders. Coders. Writers. Clean Health seekers.
Anyone ready to be kind to their mind, think deeper, work sharper, and ditch caffeine chaos for good.
Drink for your mind. Not for the buzz.
Neurothena – Join the resistance today and say "no more" to caffeine tyranny.
FAQs
What is Neurothena?
Neurothena is a caffeine-free productivity drink designed to fuel your brain without the crashes, jitters, anxiety, or stomach issues of coffee, matcha and energy drinks. Formulated by a molecular biologist, it’s powered by ingredients like Mango Leaf extract (Zynamite®), Lion’s Mane, magnesium and Blackcurrant Extract to sharpen your mind, give you fast, clean energy without the downsides of caffeine, and support long-term brain health.
Will I feel anything when I drink it?
Yes, most people report feeling a calm sense of alertness, mental clarity, and smooth energy within 20–30 minutes. No racing heart. No overstimulation. Just clean focus.
How is this different from coffee, matcha or energy drinks?
Neurothena gives you real brain energy, without caffeine. That means no spikes, no crashes, and no withdrawal. It's gentle on the gut, calming to the nervous system, and packed with science-backed nootropics.
Unlike caffeine which blocks the sleep signal in the brain and speeds up the heart rate, Neurothena actually boosts energy and motivation, without increasing heart rate, and is actually gentle and kind to t your gut, mind and body.
When should I drink Neurothena?
Ideal when you want to get into flow:
Before deep work or study.
Mid-afternoon productivity slumps.
As a morning boost replacement.
Anytime you want to feel switched on, or get into the zone, without
the side effects.
Is it really caffeine-free?
Yes. Zero caffeine. No green tea extract. No sneaky stimulants. Neurothena is 100% Caffeine-free and safe to drink any time of day.
Can I drink it with coffee or caffeine?
You can, but most people find they don’t need to. Neurothena works on different pathways than caffeine, so you won’t crash or get overstimulated if you combine them. Still, we recommend trying it on its own first to feel the full effect.
It is ideal as a replacement for your caffeinated drinks.
Is it suitable for people with caffeine sensitivity or gut issues?
Absolutely. Neurothena was built for you. Many of our early testers had caffeine-related anxiety, reflux, or stomach problems, and now swear by Neurothena as their go-to brain fuel.
Is it safe to drink every day?
Yes. All ingredients are food-based, research-backed, and safe for regular use. No dependency. No buildup. Just smarter hydration and brain support.
Who is Neurothena for?
It’s made for thinkers, doers, founders, creators, students, and professionals - anyone who wants clean mental energy without caffeine chaos.
What is Mango Leaf Extract (Zynamite®), and why haven’t I heard of it before?
Zynamite® is a patented natural mango leaf extract with published clinical studies showing improved mental energy, focus, and reaction time similar to caffeine, but works through different pathways so it doesn't cause crashes, jitters, increased heart rate, gut issues, or insomnia.
It's used by elite performers, but still largely unknown to the public… until now. It is why Neurothena is the only true caffeine alternative on the market.
Can I take it while pregnant or breastfeeding?
We recommend consulting with your doctor if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or taking medication. While our ingredients are food-grade and natural, everyone is different.
Is Neurothena safe for under 16s?
Neurothena was formulated for adults and is not recommended for children under 16. While all ingredients are food-based and natural, younger brains and bodies have different needs, so we suggest waiting until age 16+ to enjoy Neurothena.